It had taken time and effort to grow some wise men in my garden. They're not completely developed but  they have become learned enough to notice my shy star rising.  It was a surprising and notorious discovery for them. So they've undertaken the adventure to locate the source of such brightness. In the process, they've suffered setbacks from Ego and Inertia. At times confusing,  painful and time consuming this enterprise has turned out but there is still hope,  willingness and the promising light to motivate them.  

Thank God, they've found it. The mysterious search has ended in a glorious discovery: a four year old child... it's a girl! Innocent and playful; her glowing smile lights up a pure heart; fills all the garden with a lively green beauty. 

Fulfilled now their task is. But they cannot return through the way they came. No need to go back to Ego and Inertia. It is not a matter of choice but a nature's business who has changed their path. You'll never return to be what you were... thought it is not all about loss.. they've found a pure child, they've gained a green heart, they've got a headlight to guide them. 

Another path to walk lies ahead. May God keep feeding them. May God grant them such grace they can share their newfound light and blessings. May these holy forty days strength them, lead them and guide them to the place(s) they're called to be. 

 

La muerte extiende suavement su manto
Una llovizna constante va deslavando mi yo
Ya no estoy, ya no soy, ya no existo
Se toca el insipiente limbo.

Pero ni la muerte es un estado permanente.

¿Quien va a volver?
¿La re-encarnacion de un deja vu,
La gloria de quien tiene nada que perder
El suspiro de quien es puesto en otro cuerpo?

Esta escrito en el aire mas el viento no sopla
lo rasgan mis uñas pero mis ojos no ven.
Alé Ehecatl, suelta tu aliento
Me has llamado y quiero atender.

-----------------------


Death spreads smoothly its cloth
Constant soft rain wash away my self.
I am not, my being is not, I don’t exist.
Unflavorful limb is reached.

But neither death is permanent.

Who will be back?
A deja vu re-incarnation,
The glory of one who has nothing to loose,
The sigh of someone who’s in a different body?

It is written in the air but wind is not flowing.
I tear it apart with my nails but my eyes don’t see it.
“Alé Ehecatl", exhale.
You've called me and I want to attend.

It's gone

The quake has ceased, the storm subsided.

A pale rain keeps the soil moistened.

From impressing darkness, the horizon goes to gray.

The illness is gone.
No more pain, no more fear, no more procedures.
Those days of daily radiation are finished.
There is no body to be poisoned, to be flooded,
Secondary effects  don't reach us

 

What is done is done. 

As you promised, it didn't last forever.

Solution came. 

 

But the the sky is foggy now, 

Collapsed remains scattered around

where I strive to hold myself

from the consolidated light I see 

or the shine I'm determined to perceive. 

Mi Sol

Lo que pesa / What burdens ...

Algunas personas se han acercado a mi en asombro y miedo por la enfermedad como omnipotente y culpable. Sin embargo, yo no lamento la enfermedad. No guardo coraje porque asaltó nuestra casa. Tampoco resentimiento porque nos privo de los proyectos deseados. Nuestro amor brilló a cada paso, cada dia; alumbrando el dolor, la incertidumbre y el desencanto. Fue nuestra bandera y nuestro refugio; nuestro consuelo y nuestro aliento. Su ausencia física en este mundo de materia es lo que me pesa.

----------------------------

Some people have come to me in awe and fear of the desease as omnipotent and guilty. However, I don't regret illness. I don't keep anger because it assaulted our home. Neither I keep resentment due it prevented us from our desired projects. Our love shined at every step every day; enlightening pain, uncertainty and disenchantment. It was our flag and our refuge; our comfort and strength. Hi Physical absence is what burdens me.

Sólo otro día / It's just another day

Por mi no me levantaba. Usualmente lo que me pasa en los sueños es menos pesadilla que lo que pasa en esta "vida real". Pero el cuerpo me despierta, las necesidades me empujan. A regañadientes no me queda más que bajar los pies de la cama.

El sol es pálido anunciándo un insípido día. Lo mejor de todo es que pasan pero mientras, solo cierro los ojos y dejo que suceda.

No estoy de "holiday" ni en excepción, ni en situación especial... esta es mi vida! Tan privilegiada pero tan gris. Lo práctico no tiene sentido; el futuro inpensable porque para empezar, duele.

La vida sigue su curso, el mundo no se detiene; es un desgarrante consuelo. Es el principio quien me mantiene a bordo. Yo quisiera brincar al mar -Toño ya lo hizo, no le quedó otro remedio.

El barco, el mar. La Mar, el barco... entes distintos pero indispensables entre si. Si por necesidad tengo que estar en el barco, quievo vivir en la Mar.

------------------------------------------------------------
It's just another day

If it were for me, I wouldn't wake and stand up. Whatever happens to me in dreams is usually less nightmare that what is happening in "real lige". But the body wakes me up, needs push me. Reluctantly, I have to move my feet off the bed.

The sun is pale, it's advertising an un-flavorful day. The best of all is that it passes away but in the meantime I just close my eyes and let it occur.

I am not in "holiday" neither in exception or special situation... thi is my life! As privileged but as gray. Practical matters make no sense; future is unthinkable because starting by, it hurts.

Life goes on, the world doesn't stop. That is a consolation tearing me apart. It is the principle who keeps me on board. I'd wish to jump into the sea - Toño has already done it, he had no choice.


The ship, the sea. The Sea, the ship... different entities but indispensable to each other. If by need, I have to be in the ship, I want to live within the Sea.

I wonder...

I wonder who invented logic. In real life, it doesn't take us straight to the door.